Friday, 16 July 2010

Not so Utterly Butterly

I’ve recently moved flats, and I’ve yet to see my new housemate. On the first night of them moving in, I tried to make as much noise as possible making my Spaghetti Bolognaise, to get their attention. Well, I cluttered a few pans. I think pretending that I was sacrificing the cow, and then impersonating the cow as it went through the mincer, might have overdone it a touch, and may well blemish any potential friendship forever. However, my conservative efforts were futile, even chewing loudly outside their door didn’t do anything. This person is clearly either deaf, scared, or anti-social.

Finishing my meal, I went to the fridge to get a jug of custard, and what I saw still bothers me today, nine days later. This person seems to survive on a diet of butter alternatives? The only two items on their shelf was a tub of ‘I can’t believe it’s not butter’ and Morrisons own buttery version, ‘Taste like butter’. Why would you own two tubs of alternative butter? Is it a collection? If it is, it’s the smallest type of collection you can have. But, seeing these two tubs of butter alternative made me nervous. Nervous about the safety of my butter, Lurpak.

For the next two days, I had started to take notice about how much butter was in my tub, and I feel there is definitely been some malpractice taking place in the fridge. I searched their cupboards, reckless I know, but the Lt. Columbo in me just needed to find out what happened to my daily source of monounsaturated fatty acids. What I saw next was equally puzzling, dozens of Ice trays, shaped with wine bottles. Frozen butter? My frozen butter? The case continues…

1 comment:

  1. Awesome blogging. I'm not sure whether your funnier in blog or in real life! See me: - sorry, it's lacking in comedy content currently. Well generally lacking in content right now, but plenty of time to sort that out post-September!

    Keep it up! Also, wordpress is so much lovelier than blogger - you will see!